I don't know how Jake Bland does it. He is a definite wunderkind in the Multimedia Program...he seems to do everything but at the same time he always seems calm, unstressed, and collected...I just don't get it. Maybe he doesn't put as much work into classes or something.
I always think he'd make a cool friend, but interaction is always...forced, at best. It's weird. He just doesn't seem all that interested in getting to know me or something. I've found that true, though, with a lot of the "good" Christian kiddies around campus--the ones who are super involved with stuff like Cru and IV. Then again, Jarrod isn't all that involved with either of those (though he is in STE) and I haven't really succeeded in becoming friends with him, either.
This is significant because it is everything I strive NOT to be. I never wanted to be one of those "good Christian kiddes around campus" ... the ones who (1) talk a lot about Jesus, and (2) do things for Jesus, but never actually spend any real time loving people or building relationships.
In fact, I want to be just the opposite.
For the past couple years, I've tried to refocus my life and ministry around building meaningful relationships with people. I'm getting much better, but it's evident here that I have a long way to go. I'm striving to live an authentic Christian life, which at it's core means that I must (1) love God with everything I have and (2) love people - openly, honestly, genuinely, without restraint, unconditionally, announcing my own struggles and faults.
Here is one such announcement of failure.
I've written a personal apology to this person, but I wanted to announce this publicly as well. I never intended to be "forced" in our interactions, and I was truly interested in getting to know him. He's right though. I didn't take time. I was preoccupied. I left the relationship at the surface ...
Trying harder today.